Motivation

Facing rejection is never easy.  I've been working on my novel, or some form of it since 1994.  I remember that summer, because it was the summer I spent as an intern with Parents magazine through the American Society of Magazine Editors (ASME).  That's a story in and of itself (quick digression: I was hoping to be placed at Essence magazine that summer, because I was sure that I wanted to write for Essence after college.  Once I realized what it would mean to start at the bottom in the magazine world [fact-checking], I was all set).

Anyway, I wrote, because I felt like I was destined to become a writer (not realizing that I already was one :).  I've been writing ever since I can remember.  A few years ago, my mom gave me a poem I wrote when I was five.  My parents gave me a diary when I was seven, and I kept a journal for years after that. I entered novel writing contests through the Massachusetts Cultural Council for years between 1997 - 2003 (fiction pieces were only considered every other year).  I entered, waited, wasn't selected, waited, entered again, waited, wasn't selected again, stopped trying for a while, got my nerve back up and entered, waited, wasn't selected, and then I stopped entering.

Years later, I joined the Christian Writers Guild, and entered their first novel contest.  I wasn't selected for that, either (which was tough, because I had purchased tickets to go to the conference at which the winner would be announced, and to network, but when I found out that I wasn't selected for anything, I lost my desire to fly out to Colorado).  It was hard to lose again, but trying to get the novel ready for entry gave me the motivation I needed to finish the first draft, and the connection with a mentor whose advice I still deeply value.  She read my manuscript and gave me some great, detailed advice about how to improve the story, which I've been working on little by little.

I have been receiving daily updates from Jeff Goins' and Joe Bunting's blogs about being a writer for a while now, and reading a bit of You Are a Writer, and Let's Write a Short Story.  I also purchased Don Miller's Storyline book, which has been transformative for me - helping me to be engage more fully  in the story that is my life (all of Afrika - not just the mom part of me). But, to be honest, I hadn't fully committed to anything, because it's just so easy to get busy with the kids, cooking dinner, shopping for picture day clothes, doing Serena's hair, reviewing homework, driving to and from gymnastics, and crashing on the weekend, that I didn't want to disappoint myself by making a commitment to really write every day.  To be even more honest, being cut from my position last spring (only to see that, although I was told that I was being cut for budgetary reasons, a new position very similar to what I had been doing was created . . . ) left me quite raw, and not anxious to go through more rejection. So I started this blog to at least write something every week, and I really enjoy blogging.

Last month, I found out about Joe Bunting's Let's Write a Short Story contest, and even though I was afraid, I entered it, and then tried not to think about.  Today, I found out that my story was the runner-up!  And it's a short story I really like, too.  I feel proud :).

What I learned today is that a little bit of winning, even if it's not first place, really helps to keep me going.  It's encouraging to know that someone read my words and thought they were interesting.  I've decided to take the leap and join Tribe Writers to find my tribe, and work through the isolation I've been feeling as a writer.  I'll let you all know how it goes . . .